Hey everyone, happy Tuesday! It’s snowing here….. unfortunately. This rollercoaster of weather changes has not been a fun ride. We have had days already in the 60s & low 70s, then it drops back down to 20’s, then decides that it wants to snow. My allergies are wreaking havoc as well, ear aches, itchy nose & throat,runny nose, asthma attacks…etc. It’s no fun.
But anyway, on much lighter & uplifting note, we have some exciting news. Sam and I have decided to be baptized this coming weekend! Sunday after the noon service we have invited our family and friends to come be a part & witness our public declaration of faith. A little back story on how we came to this….
Its truly an amazing thing, before I met sam & even after for quite a while God was not a part of my life, and nor did I want him to be. Maybe it’s because for a long time I was hiding and ashamed of many, many bad choices I had made & how selfish I was. I certainly didn’t think he wanted anything to do with me and truthfully I didn’t want to be a “Jesus-freak” as some people put it these days. A little after we had Matthias sam had starting talking about how he wanted our kids to know God & Jesus, to go to church on sundays, pray & so on & so forth. My response at first was “No way, they don’t need that & I don’t need that.” Eventually though I did agree, but we had to find a church we both could feel comfortable with. We had gone to a few church’s our family went to & they just weren’t for us. One,because they were comprised of mostly older people, if we were going to be there a lot we needed other young families like ours to do life with. Two, I personally needed a place where I felt safe and accepted since I wasn’t a believer yet. Three, the messages…. needed to make sense to me and relatable to my life. It was an important factor that we go to a church where I wasn’t feeling like I was being scolded, or put down by our “natural nature” to sin as human beings.
We ended up finding our church home actually through an old friend, the one who really paved the way for sam & I to meet. She invited us one day to come check it out. I was quite shocked when we stepped through the doors for the first time. Everyone was casual, wearing jeans & drinking coffee. But what I remember really taking in was just how happy everyone was. The place was just incredibly warm & light like a true place of peace & grace. I remember thinking ” Wow, I want to be this happy too!”
Now I can’t remember what the message was about anymore but I do recall feeling pretty moved by it & the amazing band who sang such powerful worship songs, but not the old Hynms like the ones I grew up with. Sam wasn’t sure if he did like it at first, his funny comment was ” Church should not be like a rock concert”. But we kept going back, feeling more & more of a pull to be there & be involved, however I was still not quite jumping on the bandwagon yet. A big part of me wanted to but I was battling some pretty big doubts. I joined a serve team to get to know some more people, since we still weren’t really putting ourselves out there yet. We had just been quietly going for about a year. Then eventually we decided to join a small group, a way to build and bring together smaller communities throughout the week. Once we started going to that, that’s when everything really did begin to change for me, even though I was still questioning a lot about God & his existence I learned I honestly wasn’t the only one who had to fight doubts, that they were normal. We were finally feeling like we might actually be at home here, with our new friends and church family. Sam & I had closed ourselves off from the world I guess you could say for quite a while, especially being pretty young with a baby. We ended up letting go of many friendships just because of different seasons in life. It was truthfully a pretty lonely time. It was hard to come & open up but God knew what we needed & found a way to pull us back into his arms.
Since putting my faith in God I feel good to finally just be me, as I am, still & forever a work in progress. So much weight though has been lifted off my shoulders since accepting Jesus into my heart. Our family has grown so much closer, were not as stressed, we have made amazing friends & have found a new hope for this life in Gods grace. I’m sure I could keep going on & on about our journey thus far but I don’t want to keep you too much longer. So I will continue this next week with pictures from our baptism. Thank you so much for stopping by, I truly appreciate you. I would love to hear your story about your faith, or just maybe your next steps with god, whether its been on your mind to start going to church or you have been a Christ follower for years & years!